Dude, are you having a bad day? It’s about to get worse when you hear that your favorite Victoria’s Secret model Adriana Lima has eloped with her NBA star player Marko Jaric . They got hitched on Valentine’s Day in snowy Jackson Hole, Wyoming. “We are so excited about our future together,” the Brazilian supermodel told People magazine. “And we are really looking forward to a big romantic wedding this summer with all of our friends and family.”

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Adriana’s Secret: She Eloped on Valentine’s Day

Is Lindsay Lohan getting secret porkage? (Fatback and Collards) Miley Cyrus had her Twitter hacked. Is that supposed to be a euphemism or something?

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Quickies: Skin Me Elmo

It turns out The Jonas Brothers have a flexible interpretation of chastity. ( WIMB ) Jennifer Hudson was the big winner at the NAACP Image Awards. ( Bumpshack ) Chris Brown has no concept of responsibility. ( WWTDD ) Some German jackass thinks Heidi Klum is fat

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Quickies: Waxing Romantic

Evan Rachel Wood says she did NOT kiss Mickey Rourke . I guess she just sucked his dick. Technically, there is a difference. ( Socialite Life ) Guess how Bar Rafaeli gets ready for Valentine’s Day? Hint: it’s padded and lace-up.

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Quickies: Splitting Hairs

Miley Cyrus wants emancipation from her family! I guess that means no more sexy pictures with Daddy. ( Celebitchy ) Angelina Jolie’s seriously hairy pitt! ( Seriously? OMG ) Proposition 8 as explained by Jack Black and the power of song. ( MollyGood ) Sexy Santa ho ho hos to get you in the holiday spirit.

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Quickies: Money Shot

Here’s a little news that ought to make you smile: attention whore Kim Kardashian found herself kicked off Miami Beach on Saturday to make way of a Victoria’s Secret photoshoot, presumably because they didn’t want her giant ass blocking the sunlight. The Daily Mail reveals The reality television star was lapping up the paparazzi attention as she hit the beach in a black bikini, only to be told to move aside to make way for a Victoria’s Secret photo shoot. Photographers were assembled on the sand to snap the lingerie models for the grand reopening of the Fontainebleau Resort. Never one to shy away from a photo opportunity, Kim, her younger sister and Kristin Cavallari conveniently appeared on the foreshore and proceeded to pose up for the cameras. However the black-clad trio were soon asked to leave by security guards. There’s a much easier way to round up Kim Kardashian

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Kim Kardashian Gets Booted to Make Way for VS Models